Give Me Faith

The song I've had on repeat for months::

Elevation Worship – Give Me Faith

I need You to soften my heart,
To break me apart.
I need You to open my eyes,
To see that You're shaping my life.

All I am, I surrender. 
 
Give me faith to trust what You say
That You're good, and Your love is great.
I'm broken inside, I give You my life.

I need You to soften my heart,
To break me apart.
I need You to pierce through the dark
And cleanse every part of me.

[Chorus]

I may be weak,
but Your Spirit's strong in me.
My flesh may fail,
but My God You never will.

via

I've heard many times over the years about the importance of having a sincere heart when singing and actually meaning what you are singing.

 

When I sing-

"I need You to soften my heart,
To break me apart.
I need You to open my eyes,
To see that You're shaping my life.."
I'd better mean it!

This definitely feels like a reflection of what God is doing in me right now. Softening my heart by breaking me apart. Opening my eyes to what He is doing in me. While I can't see the end result, I trust what He says, that He's good and His love is great. He is a master potter, skilled at what He does. Whether He is softening or shaping, there is a purpose. I am indeed weak, but He is strong. I'm prone to failure, but He is faithful. And that truth is enough for me to cling to today.







Being a sunbeam through stormy weather

I don't know where you are at today, but the weather around here is gloomy, gloomy, gloomy. And unfortunately, that's the way I felt this morning too when I woke up.

Have you ever tried to be happy for someone, but hurt at the same time? That's where I was coming from. Then as I had my devotions, I kept coming across these verses about joy and praising the Lord and proclaiming His faithfulness. God-moment? I think not.

Instead of wallowing in self-pity, I was forced to look outside of myself and look up. All before I ever left for church. Wow.

The other morning in our staff devotions, we sang a children's song I haven't heard in years.

Jesus Wants Me For a Sunbeam

Verse 1

Jesus wants me for a sunbeam
To shine for Him each day
In every way try to please Him
At home at school at play

 

Chorus 1

A sunbeam a sunbeam
Jesus wants me for a sunbeam
A sunbeam a sunbeam
I'll be a sunbeam for Him

 

Verse 2

I will ask Jesus to help me
To keep my heart from sin
Always reflecting His great love
And so to shine for Him

 

Verse 3

I'll be a sunbeam for Jesus
I'll let Him shine through me
As I love Him more each moment
His Sonshine all shall see

 

CCLI Song # 3774586

Edwin Othello Excell | Judith E. Partin | Nellie Talbot © 1999 Judith E. Partin

CCLI License # 291289

 

It is my desire that I could be a sunbeam for Him, even when I don't feel like it. Even when I feel gloomy, His light would light up my life and cause me to overflow with joy.

 

Jesus, please fill my joy cup today.

Oh, How He Loves

The song, How He Loves, has been so special to me in recent months. On one occasion when it was played, it literally brought tears to my face as I thought about how much He does love me.

Misc 1
(PRE-CHORUS)
Oh how He loves us so
Oh how He loves us
How He loves us so
(REPEAT)

Chorus 1
(Yeah) He loves us
Oh how He loves us
Oh how He loves us
Oh how He loves
(REPEAT)

Verse 1
He is jealous for me loves like a hurricane
I am a tree bending beneath
The weight of His wind and mercy
When all of a sudden I am unaware of
These afflictions eclipsed by glory
I realize just how beautiful You are
And how great Your affections are for me

Verse 2
We are His portion and He is our prize
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If grace is an ocean we're all sinking
So Heaven meets earth
Like a sloppy wet (unforeseen) kiss
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don't have time to maintain these regrets
When I think about the way that

~John Mark McMillan
© 2005 Integrity's Hosanna! Music (Admin. by EMI Christian Music Publishing)
{CCLI License # 291289}

 

Now everytime I hear this song, it brings back meaningful memories.

 

I am reminded every day of a million ways in which He loves me. I wanted to share just a few with you:

 

A breathtaking sunrise on my way to school

 

A heart in a mugful of hot chocolate

 

Blessing me with a loving friend who got me flowers, just because

 

I can almost hear Him whisper, "Yes, Janelle, oh, how I love you."

And oh, how He loves you too!



Empty my hands

Have you ever had a picture in your head that you just can't get rid of? Not a physical one that you have personally experienced, but a mental one. Perhaps one that God has given to you.

Here's what I've been seeing-

{Me-regarding my hold on some of my dreams}

 

{How God wants my heart before Him- open & empty for Him to fill}

 

This is where peace is found.

 

I came across this verse from Isaiah 1 the other day, verses 19-20:

 

"'If you are willing and obedient, you will eat the best from the land;

but if you resist and rebel, you will be devoured by the sword.'

For the mouth of the Lord has spoken."

 

The first part of the verse grabbed my attention.

"If you are willing and obedient..."

 

I came to a sudden and profound realization the other day

that I was placing someone as an idol before the Lord.

I felt He was asking me to give that person up.

"Janelle, will you be willing and obedient?"

I knew I would not have peace until I did so

and that resisting and rebelling would get me nowhere.

That is when the above pictures popped into my head.

My clenched fist on my heart's desires vs. God's request of me to empty my hands.

 

There is a song by Tenth Avenue North titled "Empty My Hands"

and here are a portion of the lyrics.

 

"I've got voices in my head and they are so strong
And I'm getting sick of this oh Lord, how long
Will I be haunted by the fear that I believe
My hands like locks on cages
Of these dreams I can't set free

But if I let these dreams die
If I lay down all my wounded pride
If I let these dreams die
Will I find that letting go lets me come alive

So empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with you...

With you
I need you now."

 

My prayer is that I could empty my hands

in order to fill up my heart

and capture my mind with Him.



Are you able to say the same?



He won't let you break

This line keeps running through my head-

"And He might let you bend, but He won't let you break."  It's from the song He Said by Group 1 Crew and Chris August. {Listen to it here.}

It really caught my attention when I heard it because it's filled with truth.  So many times we think that God is failing us.  But in reality, we are the ones who are failing.  Failing to believe and cling to God's promise that He will never leave us or forsake us.  His grace is sufficient.  When we are weak, then He is strong.  Great is His faithfulness!

Instead of doubting, I must rest assured that my loving Father is upholding me with His righteous right hand.  Through Him and in Him, I can do all things.  And you can too!

Be blessed!

Our Shepherd

Ever feel heavy hearted with saddening news about someone you care about?  That's where I'm at today.  It's amazing how a few words can change your whole day.  It's easy to get lost in the busy shuffle of life and many times be so focused on yourself that you fail to open your eyes up to the needs of those around you.  Why do we as a society care so much about ourselves?  I guess it might be a result of "the fall" when Adam and Eve stopped focusing on their Savior and their eyes were opened to themselves and their surroundings.  {See Genesis 3.}  I wish we could live in "Garden" times when all that we needed, all that we wanted, was our Father. 

David wrote about our Shepherd in Psalms 23.  Many who go through valley experiences turn to this psalm.  It just seems to bring tremendous comfort to hurting people.  And this world certainly is hurting.  If you don't have this passage memorized, I would encourage you to work on committing it to memory.  If it isn't meaningful to you yet, it will be someday and could make a difference in the life of someone else around you.

The following song is my prayer.

You are My Shepherd

Tricia Brock

There is one thing I desire, one thing I seek:

To hide in you, abide in You.

I'm Yours for You to keep

You prepare a table for me.

You're my Portion and my Cup.

You are the Source of strength.

Lord, You will fill me up.

You are my Shepherd in the wilderness.

Whom shall I fear?

You are the God who goes before me,

my Rock and my Shield.

In troubled times, You will provide,

and I shall not want.

You are, You are--my God.

Though I walk through the valley of death,

I will magnify and glorify

You with evr'y breath.

When the wicked stand against me,

I will follow as You lead.

You are the Truth and Way,

the Lamp unto my feet.

You are my Shepherd in the wilderness.

Whom shall I fear?

You are the God who goes before me,

my Rock and my Shield.

In troubled times, You will provide,

and I shall not want.

You are, You are--my God.

So I'll be of good courage,

for You have overcome.

You will not forsake me, so I'll wait upon You, Lord. (x2)

You are my Shepherd in the wilderness.

Whom shall I fear?

You are the God who goes before me,

my Rock and my Shield.

In troubled times, You will provide,

and I shall not want.

You are, You are--my God.

What is Love?

I've never been one to go crazy over Valentine's Day.  I guess it's because it's so commercialized and "couple" oriented.  For singles like me, it can just be another reminder that we're still waiting on God's perfect timing and person for us.  This year, I decided to dig a little deeper and focus on God's deep love for me.  I taught Sunday School this morning and decided to ask my Kindergarteners and First Graders what they think love is.  Here are their answers:

~ "I love you."
~ "I heart you."  :)
~ "Something that Jesus made."  This one made me go "YES...this is what love really is."  It's not about hearts, roses, chocolate, or a candlelit dinner, etc.  It's about the Father's Love for you and for me!

Then I asked- "How do you show someone you love them?"

~"You don't be mean to them."
~"You can go out to dinner with your boyfriend."  Hahaha!  This little guy made me laugh!

My answer is a verse I read the other night: "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins."  1 Peter 4:8

How do you show someone you love them?  You love them.  Love them when it's the last thing you want to do.  Love them when you don't get anything back in return.  Love them because Christ loves you and He expects you to extend that love!

Oh, I almost forgot.  After I had this question and answer session with my students, they began singing: "Yes, Jesus loves me.  Yes, Jesus loves me.  Yes, Jesus loves me.  The Bible tells me so!"  What a great reminder to me and hopefully to you too.

Check out this great video by Rend Collective Experiment.  It's Jesus Loves Me with a twist!

Stay tuned for a post on Valentine's from God!

Remember...You are loved!

Thankful Thursday

On this fall-like Thursday, I'm feeling thankful for several things.  The thing that comes to my mind the most, however, involves the valleys of life.  I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm truly thankful that God takes us through valleys because He has a reason for each and every one.  The reason is often not clear at the moment, but it usually becomes more vivid with time.  The past few years have been difficult ones for my family and I.  Having three grandparents affected by cancer within four years (and losing two of them) was almost more than we could handle at times.  Throw broken bones and sprains, minor surgeries, job uncertainties, full-time college and beginning a new job at the same time and well...sometimes I just didn't know how I was going to make it.  Much less the rest of my family!  But praise the Lord, we have so far and I know God will continue to be faithful, even on those days when I long for my Grandma's good dinners or a warm hug from my Grandpa and I miss both of them more than ever.

These verses from James came to me earlier so I'm going to share them since they are quite fitting:

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers (and sisters!!), whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.  Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."  ~James 1:2-4 (NIV)

I know I can't even begin to comprehend what God's purposes are for the trials that we endure, but I whole-heartedly believe that one of them is the testing of our faith as it says in these verses.  Our Father wants us to develop our trust in Him, believing that He has our problems and worries and fears in His mighty hands.  He's not going to drop us!  He wants to develop our character as we go through difficult times.  In the end, we should become stronger because of it.  I'm going to close with some lyrics to the song Strong Enough by Matthew West with emphasis on the last part because it's my favorite and it's so incredibly true~

"You must, You must think I’m strong
To give me what I’m going through
Well forgive me, forgive me if I’m wrong
But this looks like more than I can do
On my own

I know I’m not strong enough to be
Everything that I’m supposed to be
I give up, I’m not strong enough
Hands of mercy won’t You cover me?
Lord, right now I’m asking You to be
Strong enough, strong enough
For the both of us

Well maybe, maybe that’s the point
To reach the point of giving up
‘Cause when I’m finally, finally at rock bottom
Well that’s when I start looking up
And reaching out

‘Cause I’m broken
Down to nothing
But I’m still holding on to the one thingYou are God
And You are strong when I am weak
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength
And I don’t have to be strong enough
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength
And I don’t have to be
Strong enough, strong enough"

Thanks for listening to my reflections and remember...God is strong when we are weak.  He has a purpose and He WILL carry us through the rainy valleys until we see the sunshine break through the clouds!

The Keeper of My Heart

Ever have one of those days (or maybe weeks?) that's just plain rough?  I'm feeling a little discouraged tonight because that's where I'm coming from.  So I'm gonna settle down with some good music, a cup of hot cappuchino, some Dove dark chocolate (my weakness when I'm feeling out of sorts!), my journal and my Bible.  But first I'm going to write what's on my heart.  I have a feeling this may turn into a series of posts on this topic.

One of my lessons for the week is that I'm learning big time that heart issues run very deep.  I guess I've always known it, but never fully realized it.  Many times you think you understand something, but until you experience it firsthand, you just don't get it!  Just the other day, I heard this amazing song by Audrey Assad called Restless.  It's now my new favorite and I'm playing it ALL the time.  I'm going to share a link for a Youtube video that plays this song and has Bible verses that go along with it.  It's like a love letter from God!  Enjoy~  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYibVz16Qtc.

If you just watched the video, you may have read the following verses.  They stuck out to me the most, I guess since I'm still pondering over issues of the heart.

"Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4
"For it is I who gave you those desires." Philippians 2:13

I love how those 2 verses were right next to each other.  When you think about it, God is the one who gives us our deepest desires.  It's only right that we return them to His hands and wait on His timing.  (For the record, I know that's quite difficult, but it's definitely the best path to take!)

More verses:
"When you are brokenhearted, I am close to you." Psalm 34:18
"As a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart." Isaiah 40:11

Again, these verses go together as well.  I especially love the last one.  Just the picture of Jesus being our shepherd, carrying us through the storms of life, is so so comforting!  It brings peace to my heart just thinking about it.

One of the lines that I like the most from this song is this: "You are the Keeper of my heart."  How true is that?  I found this picture and I like to think of it as Jesus holding my heart, just like He's holding yours.  So tonight, I'm going to rest in the assurance that my heart is being held by One who loves me more than I could ever imagine!

Letting Go

So God has been showing me a lot of things in my life lately.  Like things that I haven't fully surrendered to Him, areas that I haven't been trusting Him in.  It's been soo hard.  But you know what?  When you let go of those things that you clasp so tightly, there is COMPLETE freedom and peace.  It takes care of so much worrying.  It makes me wonder why I didn't let go years ago.  Anyway, all that to say, the other night I was listening to my ipod and came across the following song called Closer than I've Ever Been by Mark Shultz.  Just ponder these lyrics:

" I've fallen farther than I have ever been
Lord, I long for Your embrace
Can You take me in? Take me back again
To that place where I am whole in You

Yeah, let me fall down at Your feet
Feel Your presence all around me
Don't let go until I am closer
Closer than I've ever been

Until I find myself in all Your glory
Until I'm weak enough to seek Your strength
Until I know that I am held by mercy
Until I am closer, closer than I've ever been

So break this heart of mine if it means
That I'm letting go by holding on to You

Yeah, let me fall down at Your feet
Feel Your presence all around me
Don't let go until I am closer
Closer than I've ever been

Until I find myself in all Your glory
Until I'm weak enough to seek Your strength
Until I know that I am held by mercy
Until I am closer, closer than I've ever been

In all Your glory, in all Your grace
Lord, hold me closer

Until I find myself in all Your glory
Until I'm weak enough to seek Your strength
Until I know that I am held by mercy
Until I am closer, closer than I've ever been
Closer than I've ever been, closer than I've ever been
Hold me closer, closer."

I'm not going to add much to this except to point out the phrases that stuck out to me the most:

~ "So break this heart of mine if it means that I'm letting go by holding on to You."  Wow...can I just say that I feel like God has been breaking my heart by showing me ways in which I need to change.  And I definitely had to let go in the process and hold tightly to the One who knows me better than I know myself! 

~ "Until I'm weak enough to seek Your strength."  I know for myself I typically don't seek God's strength until I've pretty much run out of my own.  How backwards that is!  Let's just say I'm learning to embrace His strength first.

~ "Until I know that I am held by mercy."  That just gives me a really cool mental picture.  Being held by God's mercy.  That's such a comfort, especially during difficult times.

I can honestly say that God has been faithful to me and He will be to you too!  Keep clinging to Him.